How to Truly Understand People (Even When They Drive You Crazy)
By Ahsan
If you could magically become someone you deal with for a day—just to see life exactly as they do—what would you discover?
Would the friend who frustrates you suddenly make sense?
Would that family member who always misreads you become easier to love?
That thought experiment captures the heart of an old saying:
“Never judge another man until you have walked a mile in his moccasins.”
We all have moments when another person’s behaviour leaves us puzzled. Maybe it’s a coworker who seems impossible to communicate with, or a relative who constantly interprets your words the wrong way.
You might genuinely wonder, How can they not see what’s so obvious?
You might even doubt their intelligence and their sanity!
Here’s the twist: they’re thinking the same thing about you.
The truth is that every human being operates with two mental processes: perception and perspective.
Your perception is the raw data you gather from your senses: the sound of a baby crying or the sight of someone laughing. But your perspective is what you do with that data—the story you tell yourself about what it means.
You might assume the crying baby is hungry and the laughing person is happy. Yet someone else might see the baby as demanding attention or the laughter as a cover for sadness.
Both interpretations come from unique life experiences, personal values, beliefs, and emotional filters.
That’s why it helps to remember another wise idea:
“We don’t see things as they are—we see them as we are.” — Anaïs Nin
Perception is the lens; perspective is the story. And while your perception feels true to you, it’s only one of many possible truths.
When you choose to step into someone else’s perspective, you shift from judging to understanding.
You start to think like them—to trace how their background, fears, or values shape what they see. This isn’t about agreeing with them; it’s about understanding them. And that small shift changes everything—from teamwork dynamics to family dinners.
It’s a secret that can elevate your life in many ways, from greater business success to more meaningful relationships with those you love.
As the psychologist Carl Rogers once said,
“When someone really hears you without passing judgment on you, it feels damn good.”
Imagine being that kind of person for others.
In a world full of divided opinions and strong personalities, the greatest skill you can develop is decoding perspectives vs perception —the ability to see through another’s lens, even when it is different from your own.
It’s not easy, but it’s always worth it. Because the more perspectives you can decode, the more connected—and powerful—you become in every relationship you have.
Have An Awesome Day!
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